Day-by-day breakdown of Spring Break alcohol consumption

You might read this and think, "That's not that much. I could drink all that in one day, easy." Let's remember, though, that we're talking about the girl who gets buzzed off a beer and until two weeks ago hadn't been drunk since junior year of high school.

Saturday: First day in LA. Lunch without alcohol, our one and only. But give us a break, we had been up all night. Later that day we split a bottle of mediocre Cab three ways at dinner, then headed to the Geisha house. Drinks $12, had to split one. Total: 2 1/3, unimpressive.

Sunday: Time to get this party started. Two glasses of wine and a verrry strong Cosmo made by expert bartender/temporary roommate Tory. Too drunk to move car, get ticket in alley. Maybe drinking DOES have consequences. Total: 3

Monday: Rent bikes and have cocktails at lunch. Bike ride back seems shorter and more fun, for some reason. Meet for happy hour on third. Half price domestics? I'm in. But why does no one have miller light in the bottle? Two pints later we're ready for our next locale... Drinks at The Dime. No Olsen twins sightings. Out of depression, I drink an all rum no coke and another miller light. Bizarre girl pulls up her dress and flashes us. No underwear. Time to move on. Miller light at Irish pub called St. Nick's. Interestingly, it's the first place we get carded. At an Irish pub. An empty Irish pub. Total: 6, including 2 pints--now we're talking.

Tuesday: Visit the Getty art museum. Buy bottle of wine in cafeteria. Art more fun when buzzed. Drive to San Diego (don't worry, buzz gone) and grab late dinner at tapas restaurant. Order pitcher of Sangria, naturally. Split pitcher two ways. Four glasses each. Oh god, Sangria really is just as strong as wine, but looks and tastes prettier. Where are my feet? No solution like drinking more. Buy beer at Hennessy's Irish pub. Restrained from Karaokeing by strangely sober Caitling (she drank the other half of the pitcher). Adorable brit asks us if we're having a house party after. We ask him if he has any beer. As it turns out, he does. No fridge, though. Total: 8, and they were serious.

Wednesday: Drinking DEFINIELY has consequences. Time to chill out till dinner. It's past the halfway point, though, so we need to step it up. Dinner with aunt and uncle at Mexican place. Pray for them to order margaritas. They do, so we can--jackpot. After strange kidnapping by relatives to see San Diego, we escape to the Coronado hotel for a classy drink, so we think. 40 year-old guests are playing quarters in the bar. Oh god. Muchly needed hot apple cider with ample liquor. Not in the mood for going out. Caitlin has brilliant idea to get drunk back at the condo. Do normal college students do this? We buy bag of tootsie rolls, 1.5 litre bottle of wine, and Cosmo magazine. Back at condo, we drink wine until we can't see straight. Definitely can't read. Bottle empty. Best night of vacation. Didn't know could drink until drunk and then keep drinking. Maybe alcohol doesn't have consequences after all. Realize 1.5 liter bottle of wine means 1 bottle each. No wonder can't remember own name. Mmm...tootsie rolls. Total: Please, let's not count.

Thursday: Disposable camera counter mysteriously at 6. Could we have taken 20 pictures last night in drunken state? Caitlin is asleep on the couch for some reason. She asks me if we made out. Must develop film. Go to zoo still drunk, take break until late lunch. Have beer overlooking La Jolla beach...beautiful. Try to find place to watch game. Hit up happy hour, drinks two for one. Caitlin gets confused by deal and accidentally ends up with two Coronas and a 24 oz Tecate, all of which we drink. Body finally mad about excessive alcohol consumption and lack of sleep. Switch to club soda and lime. Bar closes at 1:15, what kind of party spot is this? Refusing to be put off, we find an open bar in the form of a group of cute guys' refrigerator. Vodka and gatorade--oh god, who invented a drink this disgusting. Total: 4 and two club sodas.

Friday: Recover. Flight at 9p.m. It's St. Patrick's day and we don't even drink. We are too old.

Week total:
More alcohol than I think I've ever drunk in the rest of my college career.